I attended two SARK retreats in June, one in Portland and another in Carmel. I felt joy and excitement before and during both of these retreats.

During the past nine months, I attended all of the online classes and in-person retreats. I filled two journals with notes and began shifting the ways in which I create my world.

I felt great, focused and excited about the process everyday … until I didn’t.

Anxiety rose up to meet me a week before the final retreat in Portland. I was shocked this was totally unexpected!

I turned to my watercolor paper and painted my anxiety while teaching my Hide-N-Seek painting method at a “Playshop” for the Hawai`i Watercolor Society on September 30th.

The painting began horizontally.

As my left arm circled the brush round and round, my right arm made the infinity symbol with the brush moving from left to right and back again. All the while I verbally and visually explained my inner feelings.

My left hand described my frustration with going over the same learning cycle, again and again, feeling stuck, seeing the same issues rising up over and over in my mind. (Remember the Onion from the last post?)

At the same time, my right hand explained my desire to break free of this cycle.

Step two of this painting process is the removal of texture, revealing the underpainting. It was then that a heart appeared, and I knew this painting would be vertical.

On the second day of the final SARK retreat, I watched in awe as Dr. Scott Mills drew out the exact structure of my fresh underpainting on the flip chart for the class.

Scott explained that it’s easy to get stuck in the seductive loop of learning and that it’s essential to break free from that loop so we do the work we’ve come here to do.

We need to use all of our learning
or we’re wasting everyone’s time.

Learning and Doing are parts of the infinity loop. One side feeds the other. If we get stuck on either side, we’re out of balance.

I’m committed to learn and evolve throughout the whole of my life. Now I have more tools with which to do my internal excavation.

The deeper I dig, the more I learn. The more I learn, the more questions I have and the more potential and possibility I find. And the more I have to give and share with others.

The world appears to be “out there”. Yet the VAST majority of it lies “in here” — within and for all of us.

That’s why I’m inviting you to join me for my first ever 7-Day Creative Cruise through the Hawaiian Islands, August 4–11, 2018.

Together we will Discover Paradise Inside and Out.

The official pre-launch is in December. Find out first by sending an email to me: Patrice@artofaloha.com. Please put cruise in the subject line so I’m sure to respond quickly.

I’ll share with you the processes I know to dig down deeper within and outside our selves, to hunt for and find the clues being left for us by our Inner Wise Selves.

Together we’ll discover new vistas,
both within ourselves and throughout the world.

Communication is tricky. Even when you know what you want to say, and you think you’re being clear, you can be misunderstood.

It’s harder when you’re not exactly sure what you’re trying to say.

Imagine trying to say something with pictures alone.

Can you feel the level of difficulty mounting?

Such is the case of my latest imagery, the BlockHeads.

The BlockHeads came to me in a dream. They woke me up and got me out of bed so I could sketch them.

On my way back to bed, I thought, “there is NO way I would have forgotten what they look like. I did NOT have to get out of bed for this!”

By morning, I’d completely forgotten them.

Three days later, out of the corner of my eye, I saw them peering at me from my midnight drawing.

I was smitten, but had no idea of what to do with them or why they’d chosen me as their artist. They don’t feel silly and frivolous, but what are they trying to tell me?

Two days before the entry date of the Hawaii Watercolor Society's Open Exhibit, I awoke “knowing" I was to create a 3-D pyramid featuring the BlockHeads.

I was psyched! I’d never thought of painting anything 3-D before and this was the first time I could enter something 3-D into an HWS Exhibit without breaking rules.

It took two days for me to finish and photograph it for entry.

To hedge my bets on getting something into the show, I entered two additional, paintings: “Anuenue Ali`i Wahine”, and a portrait of my artist friend Ron Kent titled, “Whole World”.

I was surprised when the pyramid was the only painting accepted.

Yes, it's a bit crude, yet it feels fresh and alive.

But what do the BlockHeads mean?

And why do they have six eyes?

I believe the BlockHeads represent all of us. When all of the eyes are all looking in the same direction, we are Hyper-focused on the task at hand.

Omni-focus happens when we’re “out of focus”, or focusing on more than one thing. This happens to all of us. We might be brushing our teeth, going to the bathroom, or even sleeping, when suddenly an idea pops into our head.

My artist friend Holly says the top set of eyes is for looking up to the heavens for guidance, the middle set of eyes sees this plane of existence, and the bottom set of eyes is for introspection.

Whatever their initial reason for entering my dreams, the BlockHeads are here to stay. They insert themselves into my journal and dreams weekly.

Please let me know if they show up in yours!

Most paintings have a story to tell. Sometimes we know those stores at the outset. Other times we learn the stories as the paintings progress.

My inspiration for Anuenue Ali`i Wahine came to me in a dream which I recorded in my journal.

Learning the stories behind the painting requires the art of listening.

Listening to what?

Listening to that still small voice within us all — the one that we don’t always hear, but that is always there.

Listen to your paintings.

Yes, it’s perfectly okay to ask your painting for direction. And when you do, be sure to listen for the answers — and then follow the directions given.

This is the "under painting" of Anuenue (rainbow) Ali`i (royalty or goddes) Wahine (woman) —right after the texture has been removed.

Yes, it's okay to NOT follow the directions too.

Think of painting as a co-creative act. You are not alone at your easel or table. You are working with the forces of creation that surround us at all times.

Getting closer, but not yet complete.

Painting is an interactive sport. Smile while you paint and when asking your questions. Be playful about your painting. Make it a game.

If you’ve ever watched someone start a painting, you have an inkling of what it means to really want to paint something.

Did you know that you are the most important tool in your toolbox?

Your painting comes through you: through your eyes, through your hands, through the filter that is YOU.

You cannot get it wrong.

Each brush stroke informs the next. You learn and relearn as you paint.

When one stroke or subject becomes easy (and it will), challenge yourself to do something different. Change your strokes or your subject matter.

I added more layers of "rainbow",  more dark hair, and gave her skin more highlights & depth before considering her complete. Anuenue Ali`i Wahine (Royal Rainbow Woman in Hawaiian)

When you're out in nature, look more closely at the world around you. What colors do you see?

If you squint your eyes, does your vision change?

Can you see red-violets in the shadows of the leaves, or orange in the dying parts of the red plants?

While the colors fade as the leaves and flowers whither and die, we can still see the beauty they once held for us. We just need look more slowly.

Beauty surrounds us when we look through our eyes with LOVE.